A Way To Start This Thing

Well, this is my first post on my new blog. Funny how when you plan to do one of these things you’ve got so many ideas about posts you want to write on so many subjects, but when it comes down to writing the first one, you just sit there staring at the screen thinking, “okay, how do I start this thing.”

And that’s how I’m going to start mine. An admission of momentary cluelessness at inception, followed by just jumping in.

I’m opening this up as an alternative lifestyle blog – a place for me to share my thoughts on human sexuality and the BDSM sub-culture. I draw the line at the illegal and truly distasteful, but after that, I intend my range of topics to include not just what I like, but what sounds interesting, even if I am not at all into it.

I try to be open minded, but I don’t claim to know everything so this isn’t going to be some attempt at an “authoritative” collection; it’s just my thoughts and opinions, for better or worse.

As for myself, I am highly active sexually… one probably most honesty described as overactive I enjoy a variety of fetishes falling under the general descriptive of BDSM, and would be seen as something of a “switch“ tending towards sexual submission but not a full embracing of male slavery as a lifestyle itself. I’m can’t really be considered a male slave in the fullest sense (like Total Power Exchange), but I am turned on by sexually aggressive women, and allow them to dominate me in sexual scenarios – something more like a male sex slave I suppose . Notice the use of the word “allow”. That’s why I don’t make claims of lifestyle slavery. My lifestyle is definitely alternative with BDSM as an integral part, but while male submission is exciting to me in sexual situations, I don’t seek it in an absolute sense

I’m hetrosexual, but I claim as friends human beings of all flavors. I’m not attracted to other men, but I respect the attractions and tastes others have, and expect my own to be likewise respected.

I’ve been active in BDSM offline since before the Internet boom of a decade ago. I got started when I first turned legal, and after some comings and goings through the 90ies, I fully embraced my inclinations and have kept them a constant part of my life and relationships ever since.

I at first saw the online BDSM scene to be a joke, like many of us who got started before the cyber fetish explosion. But I soon saw the worth of this new medium for alternative lifestyles. While I think in some ways online has cheapened the seriousness of old, and flooded in many clueless dabblers… the networking opportunities the internet presents to the BDSM community is invaluable, so long as people are safe in who the contact and how they do so (well managed BDSM personals would be one such example of the networking benefits of the internet. These sites have greatly expanded the opportunities for fetish minded people to find each other).

I believe firmly that a healthy sex life is a necessary part of a healthy life in general. Repression of one’s desires is only harmful, so long as one’s desires aren’t themselves harmful. People should respect their partners and engage with one another honestly, finding people who share similar interests while avoiding attempts to force others to conform where interest is not shared.

And that’s all for my first post. I hope to be able to make the time to post somewhat often but only time will tell.

- Tomas, a sometimes male slave

~ by sometimesmaleslave on November 24, 2008.