The Draw To Male Submission and Dominant Women
I think there are many reasons why male submission is sexually arousing to so many men. For me, I think the primary one is that I find bold and confident, dominant women extremely sexy.
Confidence is the key, mixed with the right amount of aggressive and intelligent. It’s the kind of woman who doesn’t wear an outfit so she can look sexy, but whose clothes look sexy on her because she is so damn striking to begin with. Who she is demands attention, what she is wearing comes a distant second.
When it comes to mere girls, shy can be cute and sweet, innocent you maybe take home to mother, and delicate sparks the protective male instinct. But none of that really gives the impression of a woman who is truly sexy, a woman who is going to be great in bed. Often the assumption is pretty much the opposite actually.
Who wants a woman who’s going to just lie there? Or for that matter one who’s going to be embarrassed or even offended if you bring up anything kinky or suggest fetish clothing like leather and latex. And if you cross into actual BDSM or start even playing at male submission, you get hit with shock and repulsion. (Though to be fair, I’d say that in the last decade people are getting more open minded when it comes to kinks and BDSM, probably because of general societal trends and greater exposure to sexual possibilities through the internet. Concepts like “femdom torture” would have been completely unacceptable decades ago, both in terms of the female taking on the domination role, and the idea of sexual torture being in any way healthy. While still greatly taboo in their BDSM forms, these ideas are much less shocking today, largely due to the changing times and new mediums that have helped the change occur).
Women who are strong and confident, even brazen and bold in their sexuality, and not at all afraid to be openly sexual (and I don‘t mean trampy)… those you know are going to be amazing. Dominant women who take charge of their lives and know how to use the incredible allure of the female sex. Not only for their enjoyment, but for their advantage.
Such women are usually more than just excellent in bed, but exciting to be around in every way. They’re more challenging and engaging, possessing qualities that draw others naturally to them.
In terms of male submission in sexual domination, you can’t get the same kind of intensity and excitement if the female partner is just playing at a dominant role that’s in reality uncomfortable or inappropriate for her. Submission is a reaction, and for it to truly happen it must be a reaction to something real, else it cannot be fulfilled.
Role-play domination can be fun but it’s limiting if the woman you‘re with is pretending for your sake. The illusion can only be pushed so far before it’s seen for what it is. Going deeper into it – one can’t sexually enjoy being a male slave on any level without a dominant female to make that condition feel real. Fetish props and BDSM techniques can only go so far. The real dominatrix is the person herself, not what she’s wearing or carrying.
And the attraction a male slave feels for dominant women, doesn’t require experience in BDSM or femdom torture – you can train a woman to use a whip, but you can’t train her to be dominant. It’s a matter of personality and character, not training. The effect is found in who she is. Skill with something like a whip can be fun for femdom bondage play, but the depth of the attraction is found in the woman herself.
– Tomas, a sometimes male slave
A Sometimes Male Slave 